¡QUÉ HORROR! 2016

Candidate #1

TALES OF HALLOWEEN

(July 2015)

"Do you know what would perk up this candy-ass display?

“Some motherf*ckin’ blood!”

With ten stories in its 97-minute running time, The October Society’s Tales of Halloween has a pretty darn good batting average for a horror anthology, in that--at least as far as I’m concerned--there really isn’t any segment in here that’s a particular stinker.

Naturally, you will like some stories more than others, but it’s a pretty good bet that you’ll come out of this thinking, “Sh!t, yeah, that was fun!”

And that’s what Tales of Halloween is, really.

From the “SNL sketch as directed by old school splatter Peter Jackson” insanity of Mike Mendez’s “Friday the 31^st” to the stylized horror of Lucky McKee’s “Ding Dong” (with Pollyanna McIntosh!), from the blackly comedic commentary of the ultimately pointless debate between old school horror and the more modern black metal splatterpunk aesthetic in John Skipp and Andrew Kasch’s “This Means War” (with James Duval!) to the bizarro horror of Neil Marshall’s “Bad Seed” (with Pat Healy as “Forensic Bob”!), Tales of Halloween is some awesomely fun Halloween horror viewing.

“Are you kidding me?! My nuts were viciously assaulted by a monster, dude!”

Plus, there’s a whole bunch of familiar genre faces in here, including Greg Grunberg, Lin Shaye, Noah Segan, Sam Witwer, John Landis, Adam Green, and Joe Dante.

Alex Essoe (from ¡Qué horror! 2015 title, Starry Eyes) and Drew Struzan (as “Rembrandt”) are in here, too, along with Adrienne Barbeau, who basically echoes her Stevie Wayne character from The Fog as the very loose bridging element of “The Radio DJ”.

Originating from an idea by Axelle Carolyn (who also happens to be Neil Marshall’s wife), Tales of Halloween is a mighty fine addition to the ranks of horror anthologies out there.

So be sure and stuff this one into your Halloween candy sack!

“Go bag me some of those horror freaks!”

Parting Shot: The film is dedicated to the memory of Ben Woolf, who recently appeared as Meep in American Horror Story: Freak Show.

(Tales of Halloween OS’ courtesy of aintitcool.com & bloody-disgusting.com.)

A Rundown of the 13 Best, Most Recent Horror Movies I’ve Seen
[9 of 13]
THE MIST (November 2007)


More so than being a monster movie—and it is that, a rather exceptional one, to boot—The Mist is really about the desperation and insanity that can grab hold of people who are suddenly faced with the disastrous and the inexplicable.

Read the entire review here.

(The Mist OS courtesy of impawards.com [design by BLT & Associates].)

PATHOLOGY
(Review)

Ironically kicking off with The Hippocratic Oath, Marc Schoelermann’s twisted and strangely riveting medical thriller, Pathology, focuses on Ted Grey (Heroes’ Milo Ventimiglia), brand new hotshot resident at the Metropolitan University Medical Center.
Life smiles on Ted when we first see him, in bed with his fiancee, wealthy Gwen Williamson (Charmed’s Alyssa Milano). Smart, connected, successful, he’s got a dazzlingly bright future ahead of him.
That is, until he’s drawn into the sinister world of a group of Met U. residents, led by Jake Gallo (Michael Weston), who draw out the worst tendencies that lie inside Ted, particularly the murderous ones.


Schoelermann (working off a script by Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor, who also wrote—and directed—the Jason Statham adrenalized actioner Crank, as well as the upcoming Game) delivers a nasty depiction of a world where cleverness and talent can be parlayed for a sense of entitlement and elitism, provided morality is chucked out the window.
There is, in fact, a disturbing lack of a moral compass in Pathology, which can be looked at as CSI gone so very terribly wrong, where the methodology of murder becomes nothing more than a game played by idle minds.
If there’s a weak spot to Pathology, an aspect of it that may be problematic for some viewers, it’s that; the fact that none of these characters, not even our erstwhile protagonist, Ted, is sympathetic, or even likeable. (Well, perhaps Gwen, but she’s far too unsuspecting a character for my tastes.)


So it’s fascinating that Schoelermann—and his rather good cast, which includes The L Word’s Lauren Lee Smith—serve up a film that, despite not really having a “hero,” is still an engaging cinematic experience.
Pathology is captivating the way an Animal Planet show is, where we see exotic and dangerous beasts that really can’t help their natures, turn on their prey—and each other—without the slightest hesitation.
This isn’t even a film like, say, Woody Allen’s Match Point, where there always seemed to be the constant danger of Jonathan Rhys Meyers being caught out; here, the aptly named Grey and Gallo and their coldly ruthless gang are apparently far too smart to be caught. That’s never really in the narrative equation.
Ultimately, not even Gwen knows her fiancee’s true face.
And neither do we, the audience, for that matter.

Again, we loop back to what could be troublesome for Pathology’s potential audience: that our “hero” is apparently a highly intelligent and amoral individual.
Seeing everything as it unfolds, we don’t even have the luxury of the obliviousness Gwen clearly has concerning Ted. We also don’t have the love for the character that she has.
There’s a fairly effective façade that Ventimiglia adopts for Ted, removed from the previous television persona he displayed on Gilmore Girls. Here, the charm and good looks are quite clearly on the surface, camouflage for the cunning, calculating creature Ted is.
Ted is Heroes’ Peter Petrelli on valium, with his humanity lobotomized.


There’s a definite emotional remove for the audience, without a sympathetic protagonist to identify with. But that’s a distance that’s constantly bridged by moments of shuddering revulsion as we witness the macabre on-screen antics of the residents.
Again, we watch, morbidly fascinated with these sexy, photogenic monsters, with the decidedly opaque Ted at center stage.
Honestly, I’m not even convinced that what he feels for Gwen is love at all. Or perhaps it is. Who knows with these sociopaths?
Suffice it to say that Ted is not your average movie hero, and Pathology is not the sort of film to comfort its viewers.
It paints doctors as egotistical and dangerous, for one thing. And there’s a whole lotta post-mortem make-up mayhem (three cheers for Tatopoulos Studios!) for the gorehounds. And some nasty, kinky sex too.
This is not for the straight-laced, I’ll tell you that much.


As a medical thriller, this one’s got some impressive credentials, certainly more than past films of this stripe like Stefan Ruzowitzky’s disappointing Anatomie.
But like I said, it’s probably not for everybody, so be advised.

Parting shot: John De Lancie’s in this, as Dr. Morris, as well as Empire Records’ Johnny Whitworth (as fellow resident Griffin Cavenaugh), and L.A. Law’s Larry Drake (though he’s perhaps best known to horrorheads from Sam Raimi’s Darkman and the schlocky Dr. Giggles) as, ermm, “Fat Bastard.”
Also, if you don’t blink, you may just catch Battlestar Galactica’s Sam Witwer as “Party Boy.”


Parting shot 2: A side-effect of my surprise at Pathology’s nasty effectiveness is a sudden and sweet anticipation of Neveldine and Taylor’s upcoming Game, which is headlined by Gerard Butler.
The near-future science fiction vehicle not only reunites them with Ventimiglia, Witwer, and Whitworth, it also boasts John Leguizamo, Michael C. Hall, Kyra Sedgwick, and Zoe Bell among its cast.

(Images courtesy of impawards.com [Pathology OS; design by The Refinery]; bloody-disgusting.com [Pathology banner and DVD cover art]; shocktillyoudrop.com [Pathology images]; and slashfilm.com [Game image].)

THE MIST
(Review)

Before I get into this, one thing: Frank Darabont has balls of steel. Nay, adamantium.
Balls of adamantium.
Indeed, he does.


I was first swallowed by Stephen King’s The Mist way back in 1981, in the truly exceptional and in many ways, groundbreaking, horror anthology, Dark Forces.
Mr. King’s The Mist left an impression for a number of reasons.
One: at 130 pages, it was the longest story in Dark Forces, and it introduced me to the literary form known as the novella, something too long to be called a short story, yet too short to be called a novel.
Two: it had an ending that was definitely not a happy one, and unlike, say, The Omen’s ending, where we see the main character bite the dust in his vain effort to slay the AntiChrist, The Mist’s ending was more open-ended. It presented a vague sliver of hope, but allowed the reader to decide the remaining characters’ fates; King basically left you to decide what shade you preferred for that downer ending. (Though a part of me was irked since King opted not to present a firm resolution to the story, I eventually came to understand that this was simply another way in which to end a story.)
As far as King’s novella was concerned, it ended with a choice: optimists could choose the greyer-shaded ending; pessimists, the blacker-.
In writing the screenplay for his film adaptation though, Darabont gives us a definite ending all right, and it’s certainly not a gentle one…


The day after a sudden, violent storm, David Drayton (a fantastic Thomas Jane) and his son Billy (Babel’s Nathan Gamble, soon to be seen as Jim Gordon’s son in The Dark Knight), along with a host of other townsfolk buying emergency supplies, get trapped in the local grocery when the strange titular mist comes rolling in.
People want to get home, of course. To loved ones left alone to clear up the post-storm mess, like David’s wife, Stephanie (Kelly Collins Lintz, from TV’s Surface and One Tree Hill). But no one can leave the Food House though.
There are things in the mist, see. Hungry things.


More so than being a monster movie—and it is that, a rather exceptional one, to boot—The Mist is really about the desperation and insanity that can grab hold of people who are suddenly faced with the disastrous and the inexplicable.
People get scared, irrational, unpredictable. Dangerous.
Throw in Mrs. Carmody, an unstable, religious fanatic (played by the supremely awesome Marcia Gay Harden), and an already dire situation quickly escalates into a vicious exercise in staying alive and sane.
This poor collective may have barricaded themselves in, but not all the monsters are out there in the mist…


King’s characters are brought to celluloid life by an across-the-board amazing cast which also includes Infamous’ Toby Jones, The X-Files’ Laurie Holden, Homicide‘s Andre Braugher, frequent Darabont collaborator William Sadler, and veteran actors Frances Sternhagen and Jeffrey DeMunn. Also in roles pumped up a tad from the novella, Reunion’s Alexa Davalos and Battlestar Galactica’s Sam Witwer.
The exceptional performances are then magnificently supported by some wicked creature design and effects by genre stalwarts, the KNB EFX Group.


But this is all brought together by the Man with the Adamantium Balls himself, Mr. Frank Darabont, who captures that sense of bubbling tension trapped in the confines of the grocery like some toxic gas, inexorably building up to some horrible apex where the worst in the human condition either simply deteriorates into a rank hopelessness, or combusts into raw, savage violence.
Then, of course, there’s that ending.
Hoo-boy, that ending!
Save for a handful of bits either excised from the original source material (an adulterous liaison) or added on (as per some characters getting their roles expanded from the novella, or new scenes to further flesh out plot or character dynamics), Darabont’s The Mist is pretty much the novella skillfully transfigured for the silver screen. The story’s major beats are virtually intact: Norm the bag boy, the pharmacy, what Ollie Weeks does right before they attempt their great escape, dot dot dot.
Those familiar with the novella’s generally bleak climax though, will still be chilled at the uncompromising coda Darabont chooses to close the film with. It’s brutal, people, and his The Mist is one of those emotionally potent and wrenching horror films that doesn’t hold back on its gut punches.


Coming out of a field where any weak link isn’t readily apparent, the MVP is still most definitely Darabont, who, in hijacking a substantial portion of The Shield crew during their hiatus (camera operators, D.P., editor, script supervisor, all of whom Darabont enjoyed working with when he directed an episode of the TV show) and making what he describes as a “very direct, muscular kind of film,” he’s crafted what I feel is, alongside Bryan Singer’s Apt Pupil, the best Stephen King film adaptation I’ve ever seen.
Yes, I love (to varying degrees) Stand By Me, Carrie, Pet Sematary, and Misery, but The Mist is something else entirely, and so unlike Darabont’s previous King adaptations, The Shawshank Redemption and The Green Mile, it’s astounding.
I was hoping this would be good, but I certainly didn’t expect Darabont would kick me in the a$$ quite so convincingly; he took a 27-year old story and made a riveting horror film rife with tension and emotion, that is startlingly relevant to our post-9/11 world. (He also gets to sneak some Dead Can Dance and Drew Struzan in there, so, really, what’s not to like?)


Is it terrifying? Yes.
Is it comforting? Frak, no.
But does it say something?
Yes, it does, and anyone watching The Mist will hopefully see beyond the otherworldly beasties to learn something about the very ugly, and very real monsters that live under our own, very human, skins.

“On the one level, it’s meant to be a really cool, intense, scary creature feature. But if it were just that, I wouldn’t have wanted to adapt that story. What it does give is something somewhat subversive, which I think all the best horror is.
“Really, it’s an examination of people in a pressure cooker. What does a climate of fear make you do? What mistakes does it compel? How far off the precipice do we sail? Which speaks to the ending as well.
“I just find that absolutely fascinating, because we’ve been nothing if not living in a pressure cooker of fear and the exploitation of fear, the fear of fear, so far in the 21st century. That seems to be defining our behavior, so that makes it really fantastic material to dive into.”
-- Frank Darabont on The Mist

(The Mist OS courtesy of impawards.com [design by BLT & Associates]; images courtesy of aintitcool.com, filmz.ru, and shocktillyoudrop.com.)

(Frank Darabont quote from an aintitcool.com interview.)