Five-Legged Iguana

¡QUÉ HORROR! 2016

Candidate #4

BONE TOMAHAWK

(October 2015)

"This is not the time for womanly imaginings.”

Well, this was a dandy surprise! Just dandy!
Writer/director S. Craig Zahler slams it out of the park with his feature debut, Bone Tomahawk, in which trouble comes to the frontier town of Bright Hope (pop. 268).

The dialogue here is sharp and funny, the characters well-written, and the performances (particularly from the lead quartet, Kurt Russell, Patrick Wilson, Matthew Fox, and a largely unrecognizable Richard Jenkins) are commendable.

This is the kind of horror film that most graciously reminds you of just how important it is to have protagonists that you can actually care about, instead of the usual stock characters that populate your average movie (scary or otherwise) these days.

And, whilst on the performer front, I should point out that both Sid Haig and David Arquette are in here for a time, and we also get some brief, stealth appearances by Sean Young and Michael Paré.

“They’re a spoiled bloodline of inbred animals who rape and eat their own mothers.”

While Bone Tomahawk may have a running time that clocks in at over 2 hours, it’s also the kind of movie where you wish the plot didn’t have to kick in at all, the experience of just getting to spend time with the characters pleasurable enough.

And of course, also because this is a horror movie, and you just know that once the plot kicks in, the bodies are gonna start to drop in earnest.

In point of fact, there are a couple of instances of harrowing, brutal gore, so be forewarned.

So, saddle up, people.

Bone Tomahawk’s a’waitin!

“Does, uhh, anybody know how to spell ‘troglodytes’?

“For the telegram.”

(Bone Tomahawk OS’ courtesy of impawards.com.)