INDIANA JONES
AND THE
KINGDOM OF
THE CRYSTAL SKULL
(Review)

In the time leading up to the release of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, it was repeatedly mentioned by the three principal creative forces behind the film that the reason why this sequel was made nearly two decades after The Last Crusade was because fans kept asking for it.
Well, I’m a fan of Raiders of the Lost Ark, and I never really asked for it.
In point of fact, I never really asked for the other Indy films, either.
The thing is, Spielberg, Lucas, and Ford got it dead on the first time out, so much so that any attempt to capture the same sort of lightning once again was doomed from the get-go.


Raiders of the Lost Ark was one of those rare cinematic experiences that was so very particular, it should have been left alone; the pulp magic and cliffhanger nostalgia of the 1940’s serial was captured so brilliantly in Raiders that any subsequent return would invariably pale by comparison.
Thus, those two previous return trips—the prequel The Temple of Doom and sequel The Last Crusade—were ultimately wildly uneven adventure yarns trying in vain to top the original.
And Crystal Skull, despite the overt trade-in for a new inspirational template (‘50’s science fiction for ‘40’s serial cliffhanger), is, sadly, more of the same.


Much like the other Indy sequels though, Crystal Skull is also not without its merits.
The casting of the fabulous Jim Broadbent (as Charles Stanforth, Dean at Indy’s old academic stomping grounds) is laudable, despite his painfully brief screen time. The equally fabulous Cate Blanchett is also a hoot as Russian baddy, Col. Dr. Irina Spalko, while Alan Dale’s brief appearance as General Ross is greatly appreciated.
And yes, even Shia LaBeouf as greaser Mutt Williams, brings just the right mixture of youthful bravado and vulnerable emotion to his character, pushing Mutt just north of the caricature line.
The return of Karen Allen is also notable, as nostalgia does have an undeniable potency. (The scene with the framed photos of Marcus Brody and Henry Jones, Sr. was a particularly effective moment.)
And, because I’ve always been big on mythology and the weird sh!t, I love all the Roswell/Nazca lines stuff, which certainly resonates more with me than the Sankara stones of Temple of Doom.


Sadly, there’re also bits in Crystal Skull that are either downright silly (Tarzan Mutt and his horde of greaser monkeys) or painfully incredulous (while I already had difficulty with the mine car sequence in Temple of Doom, the Crystal Skull moment which gave rise to the term “nuke the fridge” certainly takes the cake for worst Indy moment, ever; it’s also rather odd that that mortifying moment leads right into the single most chilling image in any Indiana Jones movie).
As far as the rest of the cast goes, John Hurt is pretty much wasted here, as his Harold Oxley is asked to alternate between being absolutely batsh!t crazy and merely befuddled.
Ray Winstone meanwhile, as George McHale, also turns out to be a narrative distraction.
To be fair though, I don’t really think it’s either actor’s fault, as both are made to suffer because Crystal Skull’s script (by David Koepp, from a story by Lucas and Jeff Nathanson) relegates their characters to those piddling roles.


I think the trouble here is that Indy is made to interact with a surfeit of characters, so much so that by the end of the film, none of the relationships feel properly fleshed-out.
Throughout different sections of Crystal Skull, Indy deals with McHale, Mutt, and Marion, diffusing the focus of the film, when it might have been better served if one (or even two) of these supporting characters had been excised from the narrative, keeping things tight and to the point.
Instead, there’s a vaguely scattershot feel that blankets the audience as Crystal Skull unspools, as if the script were uncertain which side of Indy it wished to explore.
In the end, not only do the relationships feel conveniently rushed and contrived, but Indy also doesn’t feel like the real thing.
Much as the character himself feels suspiciously counterfeit, Crystal Skull also feels like a strained, ill-advised attempt at replicating the Raiders experience.


Now, while it’s true that the raison d’etre of any popcorn movie is to be loads of fun, and that even the most problematic of the previous post-Raiders Indy films still has its fair share of fun, there’s a difference between the kind Raiders of the Lost Ark has in spades, and the kind occasionally found in Crystal Skull, which is the transitory sort common to your average Hollywood popcorn fare.
Much as Lucas’ recent Star Wars efforts have turned out, Crystal Skull feels more like commerce than a genuine attempt at creating popcorn art.
And sadly, if Lucas and company are to be believed, it’s all our fault…

(Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull OS courtesy of impawards.com [art by Drew Struzan; design by BLT & Associates]; images courtesy of aintitcool.com, imdb.com, latimes.com, moviehole.net, and vanityfair.com.)

AFTERTHOUGHTS (27)

27.1 Pretty pictures galore!
First up, quite literally a few minutes before I checked email (to find that Budjette had sent me the same image), I saw the new Joker up on AICN.
So this is just one of the many reasons why movies constantly engage and surprise me.
Who would have thought that someone who I first saw in one of those pretty boy-with-an-edge roles (in Gil Junger's 10 Things I Hate About You) would later evolve into an Oscar contender (for Ang Lee’s Brokeback Mountain). Said someone would then go from gay cowboy to Clown Prince of Crime.
Who’d a thunk?

27.2 Also up on AICN, this Kingdom of the Crystal Skull snap. (It’s one of three, so get on over there, if you want to see the rest.)

27.3 And from the official Watchmen website, a couple of stills that look as if this was the neighborhood Dave Gibbons drew his panels from, instead of the other-way-around reality: a custom backlot in Vancouver, BC, built with, as Zack Snyder puts it, “the vernacular of Watchmen.” (These are two of four, so get on over there to see the others.)

27.4 Then, before I leave you to it, NBC recently announced Chuck got the early Christmas present of a back nine, bringing it up to a full 22-episode season.
More Bartowski nerdly madness! That’s great news.
Now if only the WGA strike gets resolved in the next few weeks, so this Christmas the studios and networks can display some goodwill to all those who live and die by the pen.

(Images courtesy of Empire and aintitcool.com [Empire Joker cover]; IMDB and aintitcool.com [Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull image]; warnerbros.com [Watchmen images]; and buy-more.net [Chuck image].)

AFTERTHOUGHTS (15)

15.1 Congratulations to all involved with the following TV shows, for being chosen for Time’s 100 Best TV Shows of All-TIME list.

Battlestar Galactica
“A stark, well-imagined story of a war in a galaxy far, far away, yet too close for comfort.”

Felicity
“The finest, funniest and quirkiest of the '90s explosion of young-adult dramas, this WB bildungsroman was a rare soap about a young woman in which her personal growth was as important as her love life.”

Lost
“In a way it's a misnomer to call Lost one of TV's best shows—it's a fine show on the level of character and writing, but what makes it a classic is that it's the finest interactive game ever to appear in your living room once a week.”

Six Feet Under
“Alan Ball's all-in-the-funeral-family drama expanded on the themes of his movie American Beauty: families keep secrets, people maintain facades, and while death may be final, life is messy.”

Twin Peaks
“The story of a teen girl's death in the Pacific Northwest—and the pie-eating, deadpan-soliloquy-spouting FBI agent investigating it—carried on the theme, from Lynch movies like Blue Velvet, of sordid secrets and ancient horrors hid behind a facade of wholesome Americana, proving that TV could equal or surpass film in its storytelling ambitions.”

The X-Files
“… for years this conspiracist gem drilled into our reserves of horror and mistrust, and struck black oil.”

Hey! J.J. Abrams wound up with two of his shows on the list. Sweet.

All quotes are from the article. For the complete list, go here. (Each title above brings you to that particular show’s entry.)

15.2 Meanwhile, Lucas and Spielberg have apparently made up their minds: it’s officially Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. I’d referred to the fourth Indy film once or twice here at the Iguana as Indiana Jones and the City of the Gods, which was actually merely one of several rumoured titles.
I still like the sound of City of the Gods more than the official monicker, but hey, it’s their movie.

(Images courtesy of space.com [Battlestar Galactica]; atnzone.com [Lost]; answers.com [Six Feet Under]; tarnishedlady.typepad.com [Twin Peaks]; and amazon.com [The X-Files].

DISTURBIA
(Review)

Shia LaBeouf.
You may not know how to spell his name just yet, but chances are, if you’ve seen Transformers (review: Archive July 2007), you know this kid and you know his face. And though he’s been banging around for a while now (maybe you saw him in Constantine, or in The Greatest Game Ever Played, or in Bobby, or maybe even Disney’s Even Stevens), Steven Spielberg seems to be making a big push to crown him the first official star of Hollywood’s latest generation of actors.
After the Spielberg-produced Transformers, Shia is going to be up on the big screen with pop culture icon Indiana Jones, in the upcoming Indiana Jones and the City of the Gods.
But if there is indeed some evil Spielbergian Master Plan, that Plan starts here, in D.J. Caruso’s Disturbia.

Kale Brecht (LaBeouf) lost his father (Matt Craven) in a tragic car accident a year ago. Since then, he’s had a number of run-ins with the law. The latest ends in his house arrest, for which his mother Julie (Carrie-Anne Moss) needs to pay the state $12 a day for.
Consigned to his house and most of the front- and backyard by a “tether,” tormented by the neighbourhood kids, cut off from his Xbox and his iTunes, and suffering “chronic boredom,” Kale discovers the “reality without the television,” as he starts spying on his neighbours, particularly newcomer Ashley (Sarah Roemer, from The Grudge 2).
But Kale soon begins to suspect his neighbour, Mr. Turner (David Morse), has a murderous secret, and his house arrest quickly proves to be much more than he bargained for.

Now, if anything works in this agreeable popcorn thriller, it’s clearly LaBeouf, who anchors the audience with a credible performance of a teen-ager unsuccessfully dealing with the grief and guilt of a parent’s death.
From the opening prologue, which ends with that great reaction shot as Kale realizes his father is dead, LaBeouf presents an identifiable protagonist who, for all his subsequent fixation on Turner and his suspected crimes, is still at heart, a teen-ager with raging hormones.
LaBeouf proves up to the task, as he juggles all this, while still maintaining the charm and charisma that is speedily making him a household name.
And in Roemer, the film finds a leading lady who meets LaBeouf on the same level. Roemer’s performance may not be as solid as LaBeouf’s (we learn a lot more about Ashley from Kale’s monologue about her than what we actually see on-screen), but she holds up nonetheless.
It’s the other cast members who don’t fare quite as well.

While Carrie-Anne Moss does her best with a slightly underwritten part, Aaron Yoo (who plays Ronnie, Kale’s goofy best friend) is the stereotypical comic relief, and David Morse, is, well, David Morse. The man can do “Creepy Dude” in his sleep, and probably does. It may have been more interesting to have had an actor cast against type as Turner, instead of Mr. King Creepy Dude.

Still, despite sections terribly reminiscent of past films (The Blair Witch Project, Poltergeist, as well as the obvious and oft-mentioned Rear Window—it’s not like this is the first time anyone’s used the Rear Window gambit, after all), Disturbia does succeed in its modest aims.
As I mentioned earlier, it’s an agreeable popcorn thriller. It’s not exactly riveting, but it is engaging. But perhaps most importantly, its success at the box-office is a clear signal that LaBeouf is on the cusp of Hollywood stardom, an idea that Spielberg seems more than happy to see come to fruition.

(Disturbia OS courtesy of impawards.com.)